Absolutely Real Items Overheard Online, Grammar and Spelling Uncorrected

1. AOL N'Sync Chatroom, 6-19-00
Chatroomgirl: Yeah im tryin to git sex off the computr witch is discusting

2. Dee Jay Zone UK
(located at http://www.expage.com/page/deejayzoneuk)
TO ALL THOSE PEOPLE WHO GRAFFITI MY GUEST BOOK WITH FAKE NAMES OR BAD COMMENTS "YOU ARE SAD AND WASTING YOURE TIME APART FROM MALCOLM WHO HAS NOTHING BETTER TO DO EXCEPT PLAYING ARMIES WITH THE LIBRARY POSSY"

3. AOL Britney Spears Chatroom, 7-26-00
I think Melissa is evil. She likes to pose nude for magazines like playboy, penthouse and readers digest. Readers digest said to stop sending nude pictures. she doesnt listen.

4. Mahir's Untitled Page
(located at http://www.geocities.com/mahir_girlfriend/)
If you come here it must because I been many countries — I go still. I just lost girlfriend. If you want to be girlfriend please E-mail me mahir_girlfriend@yahoo.com. I invitate she everytime my home, she can stay my home everytime. If you to be my girlfriend if she want I'm ready please don't dump me after I like you.

5. Smokey Goes to the Park
(located at http://psykho.com/smokey/park.html)
Smokey (a dog) always does his bussiness on top of rocks, logs and stumps where everybody can see. He really goes out of his way and puts a lot of effort into doing this. We are not sure why he does this. Our only guess is he just wants the whole world to see his crap.

6. StraitPimpen
(located at http://www.straitpimpen.com/)
StraitPimpen always loves to here stories about your pimp way as well as any comments with ideas to increase the pimpness of our web site. If we like what you sent, you will be entered in the contest to win to be the pimp of the month on StraitPimpen.com.

7. AOL X-Files Chatroom, 7-27-00
HumnGrbl: i hate my life
SaRaH: i hate my life more then u hate u'rs gerbil
HumnGrbl: no u dont
SaRaH: hell yes i do
HumnGrbl: u dont have a b/f u havent seen in 6th months
SaRaH: i threaton to kill myself yesterday
HumnGrbl: i tryed 2 3 times in the last month

QCstuff: u have a wierd name human gerbil
HumnGrbl: i am weird and depressed

8. eGroups ListServ
Kenn: I have a heart like the sea. It's true.
Jeff: Salty?