Well, it has been a whole year since my divorce... Still, I have little to no desire to start dating again. That is, except for dating someone that I have already fallen in love with.
I wonder if I'm experiencing a phenomenon (phenomenonemonemon, right Matt?) that other or maybe all people who have been divorced experience. That is, I would like to date only the person that I already have developed some feeling of LOVE for...
I just completely do not want to "start over" loving someone else. Sure, you could say (and maybe you already are saying...) that getting to know someone is half the fun or that it wouldn't be worth getting married without the whole process of getting to know the person.
If you're saying that... I guess you're absolutely right. In the moments after the divorce though, you would rather just jump right into another relationship that picks up right where the other relationship went sour. Alas though... You can't jump into any relationship and have it meet the standards that you expected and were divorced over in the first marriage. Does that make sense?
Let me just say that the only way that you are going to arrive at a marriage that you were looking for (or at least this is the way that I think of this...) is to start at the very beginning and thus be able to get to know each other and understand each other, and your new experiences and talk to each other and ask questions and become each other's best friend.
Or, at least, I suspect that you'd have to start out that way and make every decision with a solid and pure and fun and as-close-to-perfect-marriage as you can think of having. So... That's all I'm asking for... Is that too much to ask?
If that is too much to ask, I can introduce you to my ex-wife, because she wasn't interested in that either and you'll probably hit it off!
JPS
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